My Single Mom Thank-you’s

Thanksgiving Day

November 22, 2012


My Single Mom Thank-you’s

This year was tough...was briefly out of work like three times...but you know what...Heavenly Father always blesses us with precisely what we need in the exact moment we need it. Though often what we think we need isn't what He blesses us with...yet what He blesses us with always turns out to be sufficient and sustaining. This year I was compelled to rely a lot on faith, trusting in a promise that Heavenly Father gave me a long time ago. I saw that promise fulfilled. So, while I'm thankful for my daughter, my friends and family, my home, and my car that still runs, and my bag of chocolate candy...As I move into the Christmas Season I'm mostly grateful for my Heavenly Father who sent His Son to atone for me and the people I love—all people—so that when the storms of life are tumultuous we can still have calm amid the raging tempests.

Mark 4:41
41 And they feared exceedingly, and said one to another, What manner of man is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?

Matthew 8:27
27 But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!


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The Storm Has to End

As a single mom I worry about what my daughter is eating for lunch, how her grades are, who she's hanging out with, what she's thinking when she looks in the mirror, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. This year, on top of all the usual, I've especially wondered, "How am I going to provide for her?"

Yesterday my daughter and I were driving along through a mad snow flurry. When we got within a couple blocks of our apartment there was a huge gap of sunshine ahead, hanging out in the skies directly above home. We were right on the tail end of the flurry, about to cruise into the sunshine, and I pointed out how weird it looked, noting the contrast between where we were and where we were headed. 

My daughter said, "Well, the storm has to end somewhere. It looks like we're right at the end of it," and then I got all teary-eyed as her phrase repeated in my mind, followed by a thought…

Like I mentioned before in an earlier post, for me it seems this year has been full of rampant, relentless storms. The kind of storms that are so loud in my mind that I can't rest easy at night. Seeing that sunshine, hearing those soft spoken words from my naively wise daughter, I recognized truth—my storm has to end somewhere. With that realization, came the sweet whisper that only a humble, pleading heart can hear. Words both prophetic and consoling to a single mother whose burden was approaching unbearable played through my mind like a hymn, “This is the end of the storm.”

It was a marvelous revelation, for today a huge burden has indeed been lifted. A persistent problem has finally been solved. Today, the storms in my mind are at ease. Though other storms are bound to arise, I know they too will have to end at some point.

I know that my daughter was speaking literally, but the parabolic wisdom of her words astounds me...

Truth is truth.

I love moments when we realize that we are being taken care of even when it seems like we’re weathering the storms alone. Our needs are met if we seek the light amid the darkness. While they do exist side by side, light and dark can’t occupy the same space at the same time. Sometimes we have to pass through a stretch of darkness before we reach the light.

Here I go, cruising into the sunshine—the light beyond the storm—after so many little dark moments. Thank God for small blessings. Thank God for kind people...particularly the ones who appreciate and respect single moms.

JNP

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Part 3 Status Update

I had momentum with the first two parts of this blog, but being a single mother limits my time and the current challenges in this single mom's life are taking priority. Gotta put food on the table...and in the lunchbox.

I have about half of Part 3 of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother written. However, with every spare minute granted me I've been busy polishing a separate fiction manuscript that I've completed. I also started querying that, which requires a lot of time and research, so I haven't had the free time I would prefer to finish up Part 3 of this blog. Be patient with me and I'll have it up as soon as possible. Thanks to those who follow. I'll keep you posted. If you haven't started reading yet, get caught up now while I'm on hiatus.


JNP

It’s raining, it’s pouring...

…but I won’t be snoring. I’ll be lucky if I can sleep a wink. I’m somewhat of an insomniac, particularly when the sky is falling.

"When it rains it pours."

One of the most cliché sayings I've ever heard. One I’m tired of hearing. Yet, I believe truth is the crafty, cunning, illustrator of cliché.

Right now it's pouring. The second storm of the year has arrived in my life. I must look my child in the eyes and say, "Everything will be okay," even though I am less than certain. I must stare into the eye of this storm, throw my fists up, and shout, "I will not be moved!" While silently I’ll pray, hoping that my house is indeed built upon the rock.

A writer, even an artist, utilizes pain and fear—downright exploits those ne’er-do-wells. This is precisely what I plan to do with Part 3 of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother. Pulling from life, my present challenges will be wrapped up in an imaginative and fanciful package. I'll do my best to keep my devout readers informed as to when they can expect Part 3. Meanwhile, I hope you'll stop by on Monday—I know it’s a holiday—for Part 2.4, the final segment of that chapter.

My saying, my song, and my scripture of the day: "Consider the lilies." (Google It)

JNP

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Part 2.1 Premiers Monday: Sneak Peeks Here

Sneak peeks at Part 2.1 of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother, which premiers Monday, August 13th:

"Noley loves to gossip, and Ebony always has some crazy situation going on with her ex-boyfriend, who happens to be a drug-slinging ex-con and addict who could give Nathan a run for his money—if he had any money."

In Part 2.1 you'll learn more about Noley, her two children, and her ex-husband ...husband?...definitely her ex. You'll also discover more about Cena and her feelings about dating. Finally, Diana is hiding something and Cena understands why.


JNP

Sneak Peek at Part 2 of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother

I finished drafting Part 2 of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother last night and then emailed it to my copy editor for a little proofing (thanks Editing By Suzy). As soon as the final draft is complete, which I expect to have ready in the next week or two, I'll be posting it the earliest Monday I possibly can. I'll keep you in the loop. For now, here's a sneak peek of what's to come.


Meet Ebony:

...Ebony always has some crazy situation going on with her ex-boyfriend, who happens to be a drug-slinging ex-con and addict that could give Nathan a run for his money—if he had any money.



“So, did you confront Daevon, or what?” Noley delves into the thick of Ebony’s drama.

“Oh, you know I did,” Ebony replies, “I go over his grand mama’s and toldt her what he done—how he taking Latrell’s lunch money—and ooh!” A percussive laughter escapes Ebony’s lungs and she throws her head back, her mouth gaping open, unable to restrain her hysteria. “She go and get Daevon outta bed and start slappin’ him wit a spatula...” 


JNP

Part 2 FYI

I'll be taking a break for the next couple weeks or so, while I complete Part 2 of my blog. I stayed up all night the other day working on it, and it's almost ready to submit for copy editing. Part 2 will get heavier, more personal, and have some significant parallels to my own life, which I'm eager to share. I'm planning to add a little more dialogue and I'm inserting some humor to break up the heavy content. I hope you're enjoying things so far. Stay tuned for some sneak peeks to come.

JNP

Getting Ready to Launch

ANNOUNCEMENT: 

The first month of blog posts are written. Woo hoo! They're copy-edited and ready to go. Much thanks to Editing by Suzy.  

 

Here are a few brief quotes--a sneak preview--from the first post:

"I’m sure you’re acquainted with the statistics: In the United States, 45–50% of first marriages end in divorce. Twenty-seven percent of American women who marry under the age of 20 end up divorced. Today there are 14 million single parents, divorced or otherwise, residing in the States. Of the latter, the overwhelming majority—a whopping 83% (11.6 million)—are single mothers. I’m one of each of those; a percent, a number. I contribute to the 45–50%, the 27%, and the 83%."

"You may have seen me at church years ago sitting on a back row, just me and my baby girl. You might have wondered where my husband was—or if I ever had one."

"Maybe you’re that girl who talked about me behind my back. You told people that I have issues and that I don’t dress right, or act right, so I attract the wrong guys."

"Maybe you did more than see me or befriend me; you might have dated me."

"Whoever you are, were you curious as to how I ended up like this...?"


SO THERE YOU HAVE IT: A GLIMPSE. Hope you'll follow. Don't forget: July 2nd. Put it on your calendar.

JNP

My Musings: Mother's Day Devotional

My Nana has shared many inspirational stories with me throughout her life. I’d like to share one today. It is Mother’s Day after all, so it seems appropriate.

This is one of the true stories about a real-life single mother and ancestor of mine named Angelina Jaques. I have pulled from her life to help develop my working novel, Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother. 

Angelina is my great, great grandmother, my Nana’s grandmother, who helped raise my Nana after her mother died at a young age. In my novel, which I am currently writing, I incorporate this exact story, portraying it as part of the legacy left to my main character; though in reality it is a legacy left to me.

My Nana typed this story about Angelina. The following is the scanned document she sent me along with a scan of an old portrait of Angelina and three of her children. It is an excerpt illustrating the faith of a single mother, whose life I honor and respect.

I hope you can excuse the typos, as my Nana is not the most computer savvy old woman, though she is full of wisdom and love.

JNP

P.S. Hope it's legible enough. If it seems tiny try pressing Ctrl/Cmnd and + a time or two, which will zoom in on your browser window.

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Just a Little Intro

The fictional part of this blog is still in the works. I figure it'd be wise to get a few months worth of the novel lined up and scheduled, not to mention copy edited--thank you to Editing By Suzy--before I roll with the story telling. After all, I am a single mother who not only cooks, cleans, goes to Parent Teacher Conferences, has a church calling, and works full time; I also Facebook, Tweet, do photography, and--I guess now--I blog. Meanwhile, I stay up late into the night querying my recently completed urban fantasy, or paranormal romance (not sure how to categorize it precisely), and writing my new fictional novel, Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother (1,784 words written and lots more to go). 

In the interim, I'd like to introduce myself, you know, blog a little about my own life. My single mother roots date back a few generations. My great-grandmother on my dad's side was a single mother of seven. My Nana always tells the most wonderful stories about her mother's strength and faith in God. She was a single mother also though not for quite so long as her mother, and she only had two children to care for at the time. On my mother's side, my grandmother was a single mom, and then my mother joined the club. I suppose it was inevitable that I should also be a single mother.

I respect all the women who walk the lone, thorny path of single motherhood, treading in worn out shoes--like Beyonce sang, "The shoes I’m wearing, I bought ‘em"--so our children can have new ones. I have many friends who are part of this alliance. They all have incredible stories that should be told. Essentially, that's the plan for this blog: Share their stories. 

Week by week (schedule is still in the works) I'll post a piece to a continuing fictional story that is inspired by and based on the musings of real-life single mothers. My desire is for the stories shared to be both funny and emotionally charged. Hopefully, they can be inspirational too. I know I enjoy stories about strong women who battle enormous odds triumphantly. Not every story is about slaying demons and thwarting fantastical monsters, although I love those. Most stories are about conquering personal demons and fighting off everyday monsters. Single mothers are typically engaged in both these battles; simultaneously and relentlessly it seems.

For a long time, I felt like my biggest monster was my ex-husband. Sometimes he still is. I've oft compared him to a recurring rash. I have a friend who served a religious mission in Africa. He got sick there, broke out with some type of rash all over his body, and now, whenever he's exposed to the sunlight for any lengthy period of time; his skin gets red and splotchy, remnants of the old rash. Well, that's sort of how my ex-husband is. Just when I think I can go out and enjoy a bright, warm, sunny afternoon, that nasty rash returns! After ten years, you'd think the rash would stay away, but no.

This post may be a little premature, seeing as how I do only have 1,784 words written for the fictional portion of this blog. But though I may be busy, I am also excited. I can't wait to get the first official post of Sins, Hims, and Whims of a Single Mother up for all to read. I hope you stick around.

JNP